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Yoga

Yoga

How to Use a Japa Mala for Meditation

by ArielZachow

Chances are most people know that they should have some sort of meditation in their regular routine. Unfortunately, that seems to be the extend of knowledge most people have when it comes to meditation. 

 

So if you don’t know, there are many styles of meditation. While it would be great if we all had the freedom in our lives to meditate for hours upon end in a beautiful forest next to a waterfall surrounded by butterflies, that’s a pretty unrealistic life for most of us. (Don’t worry, I’m a little bit sad about it too.)

Today I want to cover just one style of meditation. It’s my person favorite, It’s meditation with the use of a Japa Mala.

 

As I was putting this post together, I debated how in depth I wanted to go about the history of the mala, what it’s made of, why it’s used, etc. But I think that if you’re reading this post, this is a new concept to you. So rather than give you a lengthy post to get through, we’re going to just hit the basics. 

What is a japa mala?

A Japa Mala is a necklace used for a particular style of meditation. It can be worn as a necklace, wrapped for a bracelet, or be used only during meditation. 

 

What is it made out of?

It is typically made of 108 beads, knotted on thread or string, a guru bead, and a tassel or charm. The beads can be stone, plastic, glass, wood, or even made of seeds.

How to use a Japa Mala:

1. Find a comfortable place to practice.

Many people have a dedicated area to do their meditation practice. It can be a particular corner in your home, the place you do your asana practice, or simply a place you will not be disturbed. Come to a comfortable seated position.

2. Hold your mala draped over your middle finger.

Hold the bead next to the large bead that connects the strands (this is called the guru bead).  You’ll hold this bead between your thumb and middle finger, leaving the index finger free.

3. Pick your mantra.

Pick a mantra, or short saying that you’ll repeat during your practice. Your mantra can be anything helpful to you. It can be something simple, like, “breathe” or something a bit longer, like, “I am in control of my emotions”.

4. Repeat the mantra for all 108 beads.

Holding a single bead, you will say the phrase out loud or to quietly yourself. After you’ve completed one mantra, pull the next bead towards you, and repeat for the length of the necklace.

5. Repeat again, or end your practice. 

When you work your way around the full mala and reach the guru bead, you may either end your practice, or flip the bracelet and continue back in the opposite direction to complete another full set. 

That’s it! Not so bad, right? 

I love this particular style most because I find that it totally keeps my focus. Rather than sitting and focusing on my breath for a certain length of time, I find that I love the specificity of this. Pick a mantra, say it once, say it twice, and so on, and when I get to the end of the mala, I either finish or do it again. The gol-oriented aspect of it is very helpful for me.

 

So give it a try! Let me know what you think in the comments below. What did you like? Was there parts that you didn’t like? And if you’d like to share, what was your mantra?

 

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PodcastsYoga

Finding Time for Self Care

by ArielZachow

Hello, and welcome to Compassion As My Compass, a weekly podcast all about living yoga off the mat. I’m your host, Ariel Zachow. Each week we cover a new topic and discuss what small easily implemented things you can do to follow a yogi lifestyle after your physical practice has ended. 

 

Let’s jump right into this week’s topic. I want to talk about finding time or struggling with the balance of having what you need to have for your perfect practice, or your perfect self care routine. And I think it’s worth saying that when I say practice, typically when you are talking in a yoga setting, when you hear the word ‘practice’ , it means your physical yoga practice. And I just want to clarify that when I say that, I mean your entire self care routine. So that could be anything and it’s different for everyone. So it could be things like a physical yoga practice, meditation, breathing, you know, taking time for yourself, going to the gym, going to group fitness or personal trainer- whatever it is that you do to recharge and to feel good. That’s your self care routine or your practice. So just keep that in your mind as we go forward. 

 

I am noticing more and more that this is a topic that comes up quite often with me in my life and with my clients, that we live very much in an all-or-nothing society. And while there are benefits to that, I think somewhere there must be benefits of that, there’s also a lot of danger in that, too. And that’s what we’re going to talk about this week: how do you find the balance of not going too hard and going so crazy about having the perfect practice, but also not going too easy and thinking, ‘Well, if I can’t do it perfectly, you know, I’m not going to do it at all.’  

 

I’m gonna give you two examples, and hopefully they’ll help to give an idea of where you fall on this sort of roadmap of these two extremes. So the first is myself. I had some major burnout over the winter, and you know that the winters are- I don’t like winter. I don’t cope well, and when I get into this burnout phase, rather than looking at my schedule and looking at my self care practice, or whatever you want to call it- instead of looking at it and picking a couple of things that are doable for me, I pick nothing at all. Which is the wrong thing to do. 

 

So that is one extreme of this situation. Looking at where you are versus where you want to be, and knowing all the things that have to happen in between, and saying, ‘You know what, I can’t do all of these things, there’s too many, I’m too stressed out, there’s no time, I’m going to do none of them.’ 

 

So there’s one end. And the other is this good friend of mine, I adore this person. They’re super motivated, they’re very much a go getter, and they have amazing qualities. This is a really good person. So before I start to talk bad about their routine, I want them to know, I’m sorry but I’m going to use you as an example.

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This person does not sleep often, they don’t sleep well. And they’re up very, very early, and they’re in the gym for very long hours, and then they’re right to work, and they’re working, you know, 16 hour days, and they’re raising a kid and, they’re balancing 4 million things. 

 

So on these two extremes, you have somebody who’s looking at their schedule and feeling so overwhelmed that they do nothing at all. And then you have another person who has a very strong personality who says ‘no, I can totally get all of these things done. It’s no big deal.’ But my concern for that person is that there’s burnout ahead, potentially, and your body will start to shut down. 

 

And trust me, they’ve heard me give this lecture to them 10,000 times, so they know how I feel. Neither of these things are good. 

 

One is not necessarily better or worse than the other. But I think it would be helpful for you to see where you fall on this spectrum of not enough and too much. 

 

But it’s difficult, right? When you have a million tasks to do in a day, and everybody does, how do you find the time to do the self care routine that you need to do so that you can be the best person that you can be, and you can be the best mom to your kids or wife to your husband or teacher or co-worker. 

 

Whatever you are, whatever you call yourself, or whoever you are to the people in your life, you have to be taking the time to really, really take care of yourself so that you can be the best whatever to everybody else. The struggle is finding the balance. And that is true I think in every aspect of your life. How do you find the balance of all of these things? 

 

And it’s not easy, and there’s no cookie cutter answer, which I think can be very overwhelming for people because you can go to a professional or 1000 professionals and no one’s going to be able to tell you what works for you. It’s up to you to figure out what that is. And that can be really, really daunting. 

 

Again, me as an example, instead of sitting and figuring it out, I just said, ‘No, it’s fine. I’ll figure it out later.’ And that’s not the right thing to do. So let’s talk about a couple of things that you can do to start to find your perfect balance for your self care routine. And then over time, you can perfect this routine, but know going in that there’s gonna be some trial and error. 

 

Now, that can be really frustrating, but it doesn’t need to be, because the end goal of this is really important. It’s being healthy and happy and feeling good and living sustainably. Not sitting and thinking, You know, one day, this is all going to figure itself out and I’ll be fine.’ Or being the person who says, ‘No, give me 500 more tasks because I’m a beast, and I can totally take them all.’ And then setting yourself up to hit a wall. 

 

Doing a self care practice in little windows of time is something that we’ll talk a lot about on this show. It’s an underutilized skill. I think everybody finds themselves a couple of times a day with a little pocket of time. And I think most people will grab for their phone or they’ll flip on the TV, they’ll scroll Instagram or Facebook or whatever it is, and if you find that that’s part of your self care routine, that’s fine, and you can do those things in your little pockets of time. 



But I recommend taking these little pockets and thinking, ‘oh, I’ve got 10 minutes. Let me sit down and do a three minute meditation and then scroll Facebook. Or I’m home for a minute, I’m waiting for the water to boil for dinner, let me do like three sun salutations or a couple jumping jacks just to get my body moving and then get back to to whatever task I have.’ It doesn’t have to be a 90 minute practice five times a week. 

 

It doesn’t have to be that if all you have time for in one day is 10 jumping jacks, and that’s what makes you feel better. If physical movement and working out is your thing and all you have is 10 minutes, do a couple jumping jacks. 

 

A style of cardio that happens in a very short period of time is called Tabata. It’s 20 seconds on, 10 seconds off, typically for four minutes. So look up a Tabata routine or make your own. It’s just working really hard for 20 seconds, then resting for 10. And doing that for a total of four minutes. That’s Tabata. It’s very effective, and if you do it right, and if you push really hard, that’s a full workout in four minutes. 

 

So you don’t have to look at your schedule and say, ‘Well, I have, you know, 10 minutes until I have to leave for work, let me just look at Facebook.’ Instead, take four of those 10 and do something to move your body to make you feel good. And it’s going to give you either a good start to your day or a nice solid reset in the middle of your day. And all it takes is four minutes.

 

But find what it is for you. 

 

I hate cardio, let me tell you. But if I have 10 minutes, I’ll sit down and put on some music or a song that I really like and use that as a mini meditation for myself. So like all of these other parts of your self care routine, it doesn’t have to be a “full out” version of something. 

 

It doesn’t have to be an entire 60 or 90 minute workout, or 30 minutes of meditation, it can be one minute. Maybe that’s all it takes. And maybe you have the opportunity to find one to five minutes 15 times a day, they just don’t happen to line up together. That doesn’t mean that you don’t have time. That’s it, you just need a little window and you just need to use it effectively. 

 

Maybe you have a little bit more time, maybe you’ve got like 30 minutes. And the option is, again, watching TV, killing some time on Facebook or Instagram. You don’t have to have the thought, ‘well, it’s only 30 minutes, I don’t have time for a full workout.’ Find a 20 minute workout, sit down and find a guided meditation that last 10-15 minutes. 

 

You can allow yourself time to indulge your guilty party pleasures of TV or whatever it is for you, but also be building on this self self care routine in these little pockets of time. So my advice is to take a look at what you love to do to recharge for your practice for your self care, and find mini versions of it that you can fit into your day. 

 

And if you wake up knowing that, ‘Okay, great, when I have five minutes, I have a five minute guided meditation that I can do anywhere. So when I find that I’ve got five minutes, I’m just going to hit play.’ So if you have a plan going in, then you’re set up and you’re ready to go. But don’t find yourself with 30 minutes and think, ‘Oh man, I should totally find a workout. But, you know, Susie’s posted her vacation pictures on Instagram, and I want to stalk them.’ 

 

Go in with a plan so that when you find yourself in your little window of time, you have something to do other than kill time, and not be helping yourself. So that’s your first food for thought for this week. 

The next is to know that your routine can change. It doesn’t have to be the same thing every day in every situation. So maybe on Wednesdays you have two hours free, typically, and you don’t really know what to do with it. You want a little routine in your life, but it only happens that one day a week. Find something that’s comfortable for you that makes you happy in that one day a week. 

 

It doesn’t have to be seven days a week, or five days a week or whatever. If you have this window, find a personal trainer or find a group fitness class or get a buddy to go with you to the gym. Something to help you fill this time in a way that you know is going to be beneficial for you and your practice your self care. 

 

And knowing that it’s going to be different day to day can be really helpful. Don’t set in stone what you think your self care routine needs to be. Allow it to be flexible. If you know that on one day you have no free time, then maybe you skip that day. Well, I don’t want to say skip it because self care is really important. But if you, on some days, have more time than others, you can do different things. 

 

Keep it interesting. Change it up. Have a bunch of things that you love to do. Know how much time they’re going to take so that when you wake up on Tuesday, you can say, ‘oh, I can do my yoga class at the Y today.’ Before you go out you can say, ‘it’s Friday night. I have 10 minutes between when I’m finished getting ready and when I have to leave, so let me sit down and do a little meditation before I go out.’ 

 

It doesn’t have to be the same on every day. Allow it to be flexible. Allow it to change with your schedule, and with your needs. What you need for your self care routine is not always going to be the same. Maybe some weeks you need more meditation. Some weeks you need a little more physicality. Find what works for you and allow it to change as your life is changing. 

 

Another recommendation that I have is find a way to become accountable. Accountability is a really interesting thing. I am that person for a lot of people simply based on my job. So my students, most of them don’t do their workouts unless they come to me because nobody is there holding them accountable. 

 

Nobody is there to say, ‘hey, you said you were going to do your yoga four times this week. Why haven’t you done it?’ There’s nobody there to make you stick to the goals that you set for yourself. And some people prefer to work alone. Some people prefer it to be quiet and personal, and if that works for you, that’s great. But if you think that works for you, and you’re not doing the things that you should be doing, find a buddy. 

 

And can be any number of people. It can be a personal trainer, it can be a gym buddy where you have a set class that you go to every week, it can be just somebody who knows what you’re trying to do. Your mom or your boyfriend or your your boss- anybody you want it to be. Just let them know, so that they can check in and say, ‘Oh, hey, you said you were going to do X Y and Z workout, did you do it?’ 

 

And it’s honestly, it’s just pressure to not disappoint those people. Which is strangely really, really good motivation, not letting people down. So find somebody to help you become accountable. And I know that one of the things in terms of finding time for fitness in particular, is going to the gym, because that adds a lot of extra time, right? 

 

You gotta get ready, and you have to look semi put together when you go to the gym, you have to eat your food and get your coffee and find a parking spot and get to your locker and all a million extra things get added when you go somewhere for a class. 

 

And so I’m going to do a little self plug here. I teach fitness in my studio, but I also teach it online. It’s like doing a home workout video, except that it’s live. So if you’re not pushing play on the $90 workout dvds that you bought, nobody’s there to make sure you do it. But with my online classes, and my students who really enjoy it, you get all of the benefits of a group fitness class, but you don’t have all of the other annoying things that you have to do to get to a group fitness class, if you were to do it in person. 


So I’m there, I’m holding you accountable, because I know when you don’t show up, and I can see when you’re not working hard enough. One of my long term students- because I’m traveling so often, we’re trying to we’re trying to find the perfect schedule for her and for me when I’m traveling. And we had talked about her doing pre recorded classes, and she said ‘no, I really like that because I won’t do it, because you’re not there holding me accountable.’ 

 

So if you like the group fitness idea, if you like the idea of a trainer, but maybe that’s too expensive, or you don’t have a gym, or you just don’t want to go to the gym, but you need somebody to hold you accountable- if you want to try these classes out, if you’re interested, send me an email, and we’ll talk about it. 

 

But know that that’s an option for you. And I’m not the only one who teaches these classes like this. If for some reason you listen to my podcast, but you don’t like me, find somebody else who teaches virtual classes, and it’s the same idea. So let me know if you want to try that, or if you need help finding somebody. I’m more than happy to help. 

 

And finally, another really, really important but totally underutilized thing is writing it in your planner, or in your schedule. If you know that you want something done, and you know how much time it’s going to take, and you’re pretty sure you can fit it into your day, pick a time. 

 

Pick a specific time and a specific day that you’re going to make that happen. If the little windows of time don’t work for you, or you feel like you’ve got that down but you’re wanting to do more, plan it. Schedule it. Make it a priority. Don’t let it fall until the last minute. 

 

When you’re sitting down and looking at your schedule for the week, figure out what self care you’re going to do, how long it’s going to take, and exactly when you’re going to do it. If you don’t spend any time or give this any forethought, it’s never going to happen. And I don’t mean this to be like a little lecture-y, but it’s totally true. For me, if it doesn’t go on my calendar, I don’t do it, because I will find a way to not do it and to pretend like I forgot about it. 

 

And that’s not super helpful. That’s not a good way to have a self care routine. So figure out what works for you and make it a priority. Schedule it. Set a time. Set specificity to it. 

 

Specifically in training, but also in life, you want to set a SMART goal. 

S stands for specific. So specifically, what are you going to do. 

M is measurable. So in this instance, it’s maybe it’s the length of time that you’re going to do something. 

A is attainable. So don’t say, ‘well, this week, I’m going to go to seven 90 minute hot yoga classes,’ because nobody’s gonna do that. Nobody wants to go to seven 90 minute hot yoga classes. So that’s not attainable, do something that’s attainable. 

R is realistic. That kind of plays into the same idea, can you realistically accomplish this goal that you’re setting for yourself? 

And T is time focused or time based. So when is it going to happen? For what length of time, what day, and what hour in that day? When does it start and when does it end? So set a goal for yourself. 

 

A SMART goal to accomplish these self care things. Know that you can start super small. There is no right or wrong. What works for you is not necessarily going to work for me. And what works for me is not necessarily going to work for the next person. 

 

If you are starting from zero, and you want to get started, find a 10 minute window, find a five minute pre recorded guided meditation and start there and do that one time a week. And when you feel like you are solid with that, bump it up to two times a week and build from there. 

 

Be flexible, allow it to be what works for you, and allow yourself to change it as you your feelings and your life changes. 

 

So I know that my goals this week is to add two sessions of meditation, and they will be 20 minutes long. After I’ve hit stop on this recording, I’m going to sit down and I’m going to write them into my planner so I know that they’re going to get done. And in a perfect world, my self care routine and my practice are much, much, much bigger than that. 

 

But where I am right now, what I feel is attainable and realistic for me is two 20 minute meditation sessions a week. And after I’ve done that to a point where I feel comfortable to move on to the next thing, then I’ll add to it and I’ll add what I feel is appropriate for my next step. 

 

And my crazy friend who’s just go go go all the time, maybe their goal trend can be to sleep a little bit more, or to make sure that they’re getting, you know, let’s say six hours a night. And they’re keeping themselves in that bed, not checking their phone or watching TV, anything like that. That’s an option for them to start. 

 

But find what works for you. Make it a priority. schedule it and be flexible. I hope that this was helpful for you. I hope it’s giving you some ideas. 

 

As always, please reach out to me if you have any questions, comments, concerns. If there’s a topic that you want me to cover, anything- I love to talk with my listeners. I so appreciate every moment you give me. So start a conversation with me. I’m very chatty, and I’m a procrastinator, so give me a reason to procrastinate. You can find me on instagram @compassion.as.my.compass, send me an email to ariel@compassionasmycompass.com or you can find me on Facebook under the same name. Thank you again for listening. I so appreciate it. I will see you next week for our next show.



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Yoga

3 Things Every Yogi Should Do

by ArielZachow

Hello, and welcome to Compassion As My Compass, a weekly podcast all about living yoga off the mat. I am your host, Ariel Zachow. Each week we cover a new topic and discuss what small, easily implemented things you can do to follow a yogi lifestyle after your physical practice has ended. Today I am really excited to start with what I think are the solid basics of beginning to live this yogi life. So today I want to talk to you about the three things that you can do to start living your yoga based life or your yogi life. 

 

Just a little fun fact for you, if you’re a man, it’s a yogi life, if you’re a woman, it’s your yogini life. But sort of the more accepted- or the more popular rather, is your ‘yogi’ life. 

 

So for those of you who don’t know, which I think is probably most people, the basis of yoga breaks the practices of yoga, and the yoga philosophy down into eight limbs. So you have the eight limbs of yoga, I think that’s kind of a lot to jump into from the get go. 

 

My goal for this particular show, and this podcast and blog as a whole, is to help you start to grasp the basics of yoga and the philosophy of yoga, but in a way that makes it doable for your life. So something that works for me doesn’t necessarily work for you, it doesn’t necessarily work for the next person. And if you’re following yoga, very hardcore, very traditionally, then you are supposed to follow these eight limbs to get to the eighth limb, which is enlightenment.

I think it’s a nice goal, but I don’t think it’s really practical for most people. So what I want to do today is talk about the three things that you can do that are a really good starting point. And this is perfect for you if you’ve hardly even heard of yoga, maybe you’ve never gone to a yoga practice, but you’re interested. I think this is also good for you if you’ve dabbled in yoga a little bit, you’ve gone to a couple of classes, maybe you meditate every now and then. 

 

But I also think this is a great thing to check into if you’ve done yoga for a very long time, and you go to classes often, but that’s where it stops for you, it stops at the very basic asana practice, or the very basic physical practice of yoga. Like I said, there are eight major principles, but they can be very overwhelming. And there’s a lot of smaller parts to that, and we will go over what the eight limbs are and what they mean and how to work them into your life. 

 

But today, we’re going to go very basic, we’re going to start at the beginning. So in my opinion, the three best places to start: kindness, physical practice, and meditation. So don’t freak out. Because I know that meditation especially is very overwhelming to people. So I’m going to walk you through how these are a good starting point, and what little tiny things you need to do to make them happen in your life. 

 

So we’ll start with kindness. And this falls under the first limb of yoga, which actually has many, many parts to it, but we’re going to sum it up and we’re going to go with kindness. Kindness is very easy to work in. It’s very rewarding. But it’s also something that’s very easily forgotten, I think, especially in daily life now.

 

I live in New York and things are very fast paced, they’re very go go go, especially if you live in any major city. Maybe you are surrounded by a million people, and maybe your commute is very long, and you’re somebody who struggles with road rage, or you’re just sort of a short tempered person. And I think it’s really easy to let kindness disappear from your life, because everybody else is very aggressive, and nobody else is being very kind. 

 

I always think about this when someone is kind to me and it’s a shock, which is kind of sad. I feel like everybody should be a lot kinder to everybody else. But if I go into the grocery store, and somebody holds the door for me, or somebody lets me, you know, go in front of them when I’m driving somewhere, it’s always such a shock to me when somebody is kind. And I think that’s really sad. Because kindness should not be a rarity, it should be a standard to which a lot of people are living their life. 

 

And this doesn’t have to be some crazy massive thing that you do, it can be very small. So I guess I’ll just walk you through how I bring kindness into my life. To me, there are many parts to it. So it’s not simply holding the door for somebody or smiling at a stranger, its kindness towards yourself, towards others, towards the earth and the environment- it’s a lot of things. 

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And that’s good and bad. It’s good because it can really grow, and it can snowball, and it can turn into this really big thing in your life. But it can be bad because you don’t want to get overwhelmed and think ‘how can I do every single, single little tiny thing in my life with kindness,’ because starting from zero, that can be kind of a lot. 

 

I recommend starting with something very small. And I recommend starting with focusing on being kind to yourself first. And again, that can be very complicated,. It can be really difficult to do. But maybe it’s starting as small as looking at all of the things that you’re balancing as one person and deciding which of those things is not helpful for you. Maybe you have drinks with your girlfriends this weekend, but really what you would love to do is just sleep in, stay in your pajamas, have some coffee, and relax and watch a little Netflix. 

 

But you feel obligated to do these other they’re things and you think that you’re being kind to your friends by going with them. But maybe what’s best for you- being kind to you- is listening to your body and saying, ‘You know what, I need to take a breather, I need to just relax and I need to be good to me for a little bit.’ So it’s something that’s very small as that. Pay attention to how you’re feeling. 

 

Can you balance all of these things? If not, what can you respectfully remove from your to do list. And you can do it in a kind way. You don’t have to say, ‘now listen, I listened to this girl’s podcast, and she said I can’t go out with you guys anymore because it’s not kind to me.’ It doesn’t have to be some big thing. 

 

It can be as simple as saying, ‘Hey, I really just need to take a little me time. I need to do a little self care. But I will totally catch you guys next week.’ So think about a couple of things that you can do. Or maybe just one thing that you can do to be a little kinder to yourself. 



Maybe it’s as simple as incorporating more veggies into your diet. It’s something small. A good place to start is to look at yourself and to figure out what you can do to make you feel a little bit better, because it’s going to make all other parts of this kindness idea much easier. 

 

So the other part of kindness is being kind to others. 

 

One of the ideas that fits into this first limb of yoga, which we’ve sort of summed up as kindness, is the idea of Ahimsa. And we will dive pretty deeply into Ahimsa in other episodes, but for me, Ahimsa means following a vegan lifestyle. I’m not saying that you have to do that. If that doesn’t work for you, then don’t. But I’m going to just tell you how it works for me. 

 

Ahimsa translates to compassion and non violence towards all living things. So personally, for me in my life, Ahimsa is a big part of how I practice kindness, and self care, and self love, and kindness, and care and love to all other things. So maybe that’s something that works for you, maybe not. But it’s just another idea for you. 

 

If you’re not so hot on the idea of veganism or Ahimsa in general, just trying to be nice to the people that you encounter in a day to day life. If you’re stuck in traffic, everybody’s really cranky, it’s rush hour, you just want to be where you’re trying to go- it can be as simple as taking a moment to be kind to yourself. Stop for a second, take a breath and look at the other people around you. 

 

Can you let somebody in front of you? They probably won’t notice, they’re definitely not going to thank you, but maybe your little thing of just letting somebody in is going to change their whole day. And they’re going to be like, ‘Oh, I don’t have to be so frickin rude all the time, I can be kind too.’ Maybe it’s as simple as holding the door for somebody. 

 

I hear every now and then on the news about these lines at Starbucks at the drive thru, where you pay for the drink for the person behind you. Something little like that is not only going to possibly change the course of somebody else’s day, but it could really make you feel good too. And this is a good time to be selfish. 

“You’re allowed to feel good about doing good things for other people.”

 

You’re allowed to feel good about doing good things for other people. That is totally okay in my book. And it’s a really good way to sort of get your own little kindness high, which is not a bad thing to add to your day. And sort of this final little part of kindness is kindness towards the earth, towards the environment, towards this place that we call home. 

 

This can be however big or however small you want it to be, but I think it’s something that’s very important. And I think it’s something that’s getting a lot more traction nowadays, but it’s also something that a lot of people turn a blind eye to. 

 

So maybe you start with just bringing reusable bags to the grocery store. That’s a really great place to start. Maybe it’s choosing food at the farmers market over a cauliflower that’s wrapped in plastic at the grocery store. Maybe it’s picking up trash when you go on a walk -something like that. Something little. 

 

You’re not going to be rewarded or thanked for any of these things. So you have to know that you are doing good. And you have to sort of be okay with yourself to say, ‘no one’s probably going to recognize this. But you know what, I know that I did good, and it makes me feel good.’ 

 

There’s number one. Kindness. Kindness to yourself, towards others, and towards the planet. So pick one as a starting place and then let that grow and let that build.

Number two is- I’m going to call it Asana, which is your physical practice. But I think that most people should expand on this. 

 

Again, if you’re following really, really strictly this yoga philosophy- And yoga is between five and 10,000 years old, so if you talk to the Yogi’s of five and 10,000 years ago, they’re going to say you need to do specifically this practice, and you need to do these poses and these asanas. And that’s how you fulfill this basis of living a yogi life. It’s great if you can do a yoga based physical practice, an Asana based practice, but I don’t think that it has to be that. 

 

Maybe you don’t like yoga classes, maybe it’s just not your thing. But what you should be doing, in my opinion, is moving your body every day. 

 

The body is designed to move. It’s not designed to sit and be stationary as often as we are. So what can you do to get your body moving to start to feel good? It’s going to be potentially life changing thing for you. 

 

If you’re somebody who doesn’t do any sort of physical movement or physical exercise, it can be difficult to get started. But I think that very quickly you’re going to see the benefits of why you should be doing that. I do yoga four or five times a week- pretty often. I love it, and it always makes me feel good. 

 

But it is not my go to. 

 

In a perfect world, every day I take like three or four really long, super easy walks, and it’s sunshiny and its warm. But that’s not always an option for me. So that’s always my go to, but I dabble in a lot of things. 

 

I’m a group fitness instructor, so I get a lot of physical exercise through the classes that I teach. And I know that some of my students strictly attend my classes and that’s what their physical exercise is, but it can really be anything that works for you. 

 

If you like to go swimming, let that be your physical practice or your asana practice. Again, you have the option to go to a yoga class, you can go for personal training, you can go on a walk or take a hike, anything that’s going to get your body moving and get you feeling good is okay. It doesn’t have to be something huge. 

 

It doesn’t have to be what the person next to you is doing. Pick something you love, something that you’re going to be excited to do most days, if not every day. And I encourage you to explore. 

 

Try a bunch of different things. I didn’t find what I loved until I found a bunch of things that I really hated. And ironically enough, I hate going to fitness classes, but I love teaching them. So I know that that’s where I’m going to get my physical practice, is through teaching a class. 

“The body is designed to move.”

And I realized that that’s maybe not an option for you, maybe you don’t want to restart your whole life and become a fitness trainer. But maybe you like going to those classes. 

 

And there are a plethora of free options online as well. This isn’t something that you have to pay for. Go to YouTube, see if you can find some free yoga classes or some free fitness classes. This can be anything that works for you. 

 

It can be five minutes, it can be five hours a day. Anything that gets your body moving is going to give you a really solid base, and it’s going to start to build you up and make you feel good. And that goodness is going to spread to all other parts of your life. 



And finally, my third, and this is a big one, this is a scary one- meditation. 

 

Now, before you freak out and before you turn this off, just hold on for a second, because I’m going to walk you through it. 

 

People get very overwhelmed when they hear the word meditation. I think that most people know that they should be meditating in some way,  but most of those people also say, ‘you know what, I cannot sit and empty my mind and sit perfectly still, it’s too boring. I don’t like it. I’m not good at it. So I’m not going to do it.’ 

 

And I’m gonna let you and I’m a little secret. 

 

I suck at meditation. I’m really, really, really bad at it. And I don’t do it as often as I should, but I know that it’s important, and I know that when I do it with regularity, I feel amazing. 

 

So it’s something that I really do put an effort into adding into my daily routine of trying to live this nice, rounded Yogi life. And again, this is what works for you, so I’m going to give you a couple of suggestions. 

 

I encourage you to try a bunch of them out and find what you like the best. But know that meditation is a journey. It’s not easy. It takes a little getting used to. But once you find your groove and once you find a style that you like, I think you’re going to be really happy with the outcome. 

 

So the place that I always recommend to start when you’re starting a meditation practice is to find a guided meditation. And all that means is you’re listening to a voice tell you what to do. It’s really helpful because it takes out all of the question marks. 

 

There’s no, ‘how long should I sit here? How should I be sitting? What do I think about? How do I do this? How do I breathe?’ There will be somebody there via your audio or your video or through an app to tell you exactly what to do. Different voices sound nice to different people, lots of these options are free, several of them are paid, so you can try a little bit of everything and find what you like. 

 

But guided meditation is where I got my start. And I’m telling you, it changed my life. 

 

It showed me that meditation doesn’t have to be this crazy, you know, sit in the middle of the woods and hold perfectly still and empty your mind. It’s not that. It’s what works best for you. 

 

And again, if you go back and you ask these original creators of yoga, and these original yoga philosophers, they’re going to tell you ‘don’t pick up your stupid phone and do meditation that way.’ I say, do what works for you. If a guided meditation is going to get you to meditate on a regular basis, do that. Pick up your phone. 

 

The world is full of these amazing, often free tools that you can use to enjoy your yoga practice. Another option that you can try is to sit and just pay attention to your breath. 

 

It can be as simple as that just sitting and saying, ‘Where in my body and my feeling my breath? Is my breath shallow? Or is it deep? Is it long? Or is it short? Is it easy? Is it labored? Am I breathing through my nose or through my mouth?’ 

 

That’s such a good place to start. Just to sit and be aware and in tune with your body. That’s a really, really good, very easy way to start. And you can do that anywhere. It can last for as long or as little as you want. 

 

And if you like this sort of focus on the breath, there’s a million ways to build on that. And again, I encourage you to look up a video or a recording of somebody walking you through different types of breath focused meditation. So there’s a ton of ways that you can do that. 

This is one of my favorite ways to meditate, and I do this when I get nervous, or when I fly. I am a very terrible flyer. I get so freaked out and I just- I just don’t like it. It’s ironic, I know, because I fly all the time, but the thing that keeps me calm and gets me through my flights is sitting there and thinking ‘where do I feel my breath?’ 

 

My favorite type of meditative breathing, it’s a three part breath. So first you inhale and expand your belly and then you let your ribs expand and then you let your chest rise. On your exhale, you let your chest fall, ribs relax, and a little contraction through the belly. And that can get me through a very nervous, very anxious spell, or anxious bit of flying or whatever it is. It’s it’s an immediate calm for me. I love that style of meditation. 

 

And another meditation option- this is something that I really love. You maybe see a Yogi’s wearing beads, like a beaded necklace, or beaded bracelet. Those are called Japa Malas. 

 

Traditionally they have 108 beads on them, and the best way to know how to use it- is it’s sort of like a rosary. So you sit and you hold one bead, and you pick a mantra, and you say that mantra out loud or to yourself. Then you go to the next bead, and you say it again, and you do it for the length of the necklace or the bracelet. And if you want, you do it again and go back in the opposite direction. 

 

This is my go to. I love the breathing style, but I love the Japa Mala too, because there’s a very specific starting and ending point. And there’s a very specific goal of ‘say this mantra. Now say it again. Now say it again until you reach the end of that set that you’re doing.’ 

 

I personally wear my mala all the time. I made mine myself, you can make your own, you can buy one from anywhere, they can be very inexpensive, made with wood or seeds. Sometimes they’re made with real stone. They can be anywhere from five to $500. So it’s whatever you want to spend. Or make one yourself. But it’s a nice thing to have. 

 

For me simply having this mala on my body all of the time gives me this sort of like easy meditative state because I know what the mala means. I know what I use it for, and I know that when it’s in my hand, I go into this meditative state. So it’s an easy thing to jump into. And it’s a really nice thing to have with me all the time. 

 

So again, try those out, see what you like, see what works for you. Maybe there are things you don’t like, maybe some are very intriguing, or others bore the living daylights out of you. Don’t try those ones or don’t continue with those ones, but explore a little bit. It’s much like the physical practice. 

 

You have to be excited to try different things, to find what works for you. If you try one or two things and you don’t like either of them and you give up, you’re never going to be able to lay this foundation that you can build on. So go in knowing that there’s going to be some sort of questionable periods where you don’t know what’s going to be your perfect way to incorporate these things into your life. 

 

But if you go in excited to try and excited to learn and excited to figure out what your perfect sweet spot is, I think that in the end, all of the hard work is going to pay off, and you’re going to be glad that you took the time to do all of this.

“Practice kindness, move your body, and make time for meditation.”

So in summation, the three things that I think you should be adding to your life to start to sort of live this Yogi life, this yoga philosophy, practice kindness to yourself, to others, to the world. Find some way to move your body every day, whether it’s a yoga class, a walk, a hike, a fitness class, time with a personal trainer, anything that gets you to move your body, every day. And some sort of meditation practice, no matter how long or how short, no matter what style, find a little time to quiet yourself to be still to be alone, and to check in with your body. 

 

I hope that this was helpful for you. I hope this has given you some ideas, or at least a little bit of a starting point. If you listen to this, and you’re still totally lost and totally have no idea what to do, please reach out to me I’d love to have a little talk with you and see where we should start with you and what what I think would be most beneficial for you. If you enjoyed this show, I invite you to follow me on Instagram, my Instagram handle is @compassion.as.my.compass, you can send me an email to Ariel@compassionasmy ompass.com and if you’re feeling super crazy, I would so love it if you left a review of this show. Again, never hesitate to reach out to me. I love to connect with my followers and with my listeners. If you have any requests for shows that you would like to hear in the future, or you would like to be a guest on one of my shows, send me a message on Instagram or send me an email. I look forward to hearing from you. Thank you so much for listening and I will see you next week.

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InterviewsYoga

What Can Yoga Offer Me?

by ArielZachow

An interview with Erica Settino

Considering beginning your own yoga practice or joining a studio, but not sure what yoga can offer? This week I spend some time with Erica Settino, long time yoga teacher, talking about what benefits a yoga practice has to offer, how to find a teacher you love, and a practice that fits into your life.

Ariel Zachow

Hello, and welcome to Compassion As My Compass, a weekly podcast all about living yoga off the mat. I’m your host Ariel Zachow. Each week we cover a new topic and discuss what small, easily implemented things you can do to follow a yogi lifestyle after your physical practice has ended. I am very excited to welcome our guest for this week. Her name is Erica. She is a long time yoga teacher Yoga has always been a part of her life. And she’s going to share with us today a little bit of her story. Thank you, Erica so much for being here. I’m really excited to sort of cover the topic of who Yoga is good for and the benefits that it can offer everyone.

 

 

Erica Settino

Oh, great. Thank you for having me.

 

 

Ariel Zachow

I want to jump right in so why don’t you tell our listeners a little bit about yourself, what you do, and your history with yoga.

 

 

Erica Settino

So I have been teaching yoga for 18 years, I was fortunate enough to be raised in a household where practicing yoga was the norm. My mother was a yoga practitioner. And I would come home most days from school and find her in a headstand finishing up her practice as we were getting home. It was a very normal thing for me to watch her take that time and find the time in her day, whether it was before work or after work, or as I said, when we were younger when we were coming home from school. And as I started to get a little bit older, I had great interest in what she was doing and why. So I was fortunate enough to start to learn from her.

 And I can remember sitting on the floor learning from books, just pictures and books. And my very first teacher would have been Lily Exholen. She was around on PBS I think and she did a gentle yoga. And then Rodney Yee. And this is all from books and DVDs and or actually at the time they were taped. And so as I got a a little bit older and definitely found myself more drawn to the whole system of yoga, I found my own teacher when I was 15 years old. And I started practicing. And by the time I was 20, I was certified with my first certification and I was teaching at her studio. They say that if you’re born into a yoga family, it’s very auspicious. And they also say that if you have found yoga in this life, more than likely, you have found it in others. And I absolutely believe that, you know, it shows up as you’re ready, and you’re drawn to it. And there’s a reason for it. 

I’m very, very grateful for it in my life. It’s a very big part of my life. It’s a big part of who I am and what I do. I founded a yoga based nonprofit organization called Karuna For Animals. And Karuna is a Sanskrit word. that means compassion. And it’s a lot of education based on yoga principles. And I’m bringing that a little bit more mainstream and out of the yoga studio and really starting to help people understand that we could use these principles as the blueprint for our lives. And in doing so, we really can begin to extend compassion and basic goodness and loving kindness and all of these things that we come to know through the practice of yoga, to all living being.

 

 

Ariel Zachow

So has yoga always been for you more than just the physical aspect, because I think that that’s something that gets lost a lot. And I I always blame it on just Americans in general, I don’t know what happens in other countries. But I find that here, most people think that Yoga is the 60 or 90 minute class that they go to a couple of times a week, and they have no idea that there’s so many other parts to it. So I’m interested to know, was that something that your mom taught you growing up? Have you always known that it’s, you know, the Asana is just a really small portion of it? Or was that something that you learned along the way?

 

 

Erica Settino

I think that it was experiential, we didn’t really talked about that component. My mother is not a teacher of yoga, she was a gymnast. And she got very hurt as a gymnast. And, and she found yoga after that. And she was able to utilize yoga as a healing modality. And then she came to see that she liked how it made her feel as well. And, and the meditative aspect of things. And that’s kind of what I think that I was picking up on as a child was that it was it was shifting the way my mother felt. And when I was in the room with her, it shifted how I felt. And it was pretty clear that that was happening. So I think that as I got older, and you know that the thing of it is, is that here, yes, in America, if you go to take a yoga class, you’re doing the physical Asana work. So it is a more difficult thing for people to understand that there’s more work. And I think it takes a really skilled teacher to bring that into each class, it can be almost a little sneaky, where you work in the systematic process of yoga and everything else that we have available to us. 

So that we can really begin to utilize the whole of the process. And also, the way it’s been marketed here has really been to the detriment of the systematic process of yoga, and what we’re actually trying to do with yoga. And, and actually to take it a step further, are we trying to do anything at all? So because there’s no real endgame with yoga, you know, then there’s no real external goal. So it’s taken a long time for people to move away from this idea. I can remember I was very young when I started teaching. And I can remember people coming to me and saying, literally, ‘I want my arms to look like Madonna’s arms.’ I mean, that was the time when Madonna was, you know, big in her physique. And she was practicing Bikram yoga four hours a day. And, and that’s what people were coming to class for. 

And I, even at 20 years old, I was of the mindset ‘well, your arms will change, but you know, I’m more interested in what else is going to shift for us.’ But you know, if they come for the arms, and they stay for the rest, then it’s a bit of a win for everybody. But it is more challenging, it’s more challenging to find people who are willing to do the deeper work that yoga really gives us the opportunity to be doing

 

 

Ariel Zachow

When you teach, how do you find the balance of ‘Okay, well, I have somebody who’s come in, and what they are really wanting is a workout. And yes, I can sort of offer them that,’ But how do you find the balance of keeping that but showing your students that there’s more to it, and it’s very rewarding, and it doesn’t have to be this crazy, hyper focused, ‘I have to get to enlightenment’, how are you allowing your students to sort of explore that idea and find the balance with them?

If you’d prefer to listen to this interview, you can do so HERE.

Erica Settino

I think that we can do it in a lot of different ways. And there is a, there is a readiness there, there needs to be a willingness, and there’s a readiness that you can, as you teach more and more. And as you’re spending time with people, I think a really well informed teacher and a really mindful teacher will begin to see the readiness, there’s shifting that’s occurring at all times. So to be in, you know, I, my teachers, Cindy Lee is always talking about, you know, we don’t need to roll out all of the information in one setting in one in one practice, we can, we will overwhelm them, they will not come back, they will more than likely hear something they don’t want to hear. And you know, and that’s not what we’re trying to do. 

So little bits of information over the course of time can be very helpful repetition is very helpful. And working in the more subtle aspects of the practice. And like I said, it’s almost a little sneaky. It’s almost a little sneaky. And then they find that they enjoy joy it and they’re feeling better, something is shifting. And you know, and they don’t necessarily need to tell you that if they keep coming back, you know that there’s something that is resonating with them. And it’s not really up to us to decide what that has to be in any given moment. You know, because we can’t really- our expectations of our students, we have to check that as well as teachers. So we’re really just there to offer the information in the most non judgmental, harmless way that we can as well. 

And it is our job, in a sense, to push a bit, push boundaries, push out of our comfort zone, we certainly do that with Asana. And you know, a lot of the times if that’s what I’m doing with us, and that’s when I will bring in a little bit more of the other information, try to make some connections where connections haven’t been made. Part of the reason why we are moving out of our comfort zone and often so that we can trust that we can do it elsewhere. So helping them to make that connection can be really, really powerful.

 

Ariel Zachow

So having practiced, I don’t know, I call it the yoga philosophy, just basically the ideas that Yoga is built on, having that in your life for such a significant amount of time, what aspects of your life have changed because of it?

 

Erica Settino

Oh, probably, well, I mean, it’s ever changing. The thing is, is like because wherever changing, but I guess that I’m lucky, really very fortunate in that regard is that I have this touchstone. Because things are ever changing, I’m able to come back to the philosophy and the teachings and the lessons that I have learned over and over and over again. So as I continue to evolve, the teachings continue to support me. So that’s I think one of the wonderful things about yoga is that you can go really, really in depth and it can get very heady, or, you know, we can keep it very simple, and very basic, so to speak. 

And the most basic is that it’s, it’s appropriate for every step along the way of each of our individual paths. And that’s like the magic and the mystery of it as well, you know, so it’s really amazing yoga meets us where we are all the time, over and over and over again. So as I find myself in different situations, or scenarios, or perhaps more challenging times of my life, whatever the case may be, I’m able to come back to the teachings and recognize where I can utilize them more, you know. Where have I gotten away from something a little bit and perhaps, that’s causing some of this suffering that I’m that I’m I’m going through at the moment, maybe I’m struggling too much, and I’ve forgotten something. 

And then it meets you again, it shows again. So it really does, it’s not something that we learn it and we’re like, ‘oh, yep, got that,’ you take interest, you learn it, and then you’re done with that it’s a cold, completely different way of learning and assimilating and then living it. And that’s why I say Yoga is not really something we do. It’s, it’s really how we, and how we choose to show up, and where we’re kind of living from. And that’s, you know, that’s a process and a practice, all in of itself. So sometimes we drop one area, and we have to go back and pick it up and look at that. And we’re always going to be granted the opportunity to do that, that’s, I think, you know, kind of what life is for offering these opportunities, where we can kind of pick that up again, and see where we might, where we might do something, I’m not going to say better, but perhaps differently, if something’s not working, perhaps we can, you know, learn something else along the way,

 

Ariel Zachow

Who, in your opinion, is yoga for? Is there anybody that you would say should not do yoga for any reason?

 

Erica Settino

I think that Yoga is for everybody and every physical body. We see it more and more now with this world of influencers, and people who are willing to step up and step out and say, ‘I don’t need to look a certain way to practice yoga,’ which is fabulous, we need that, you know, for so long it was in a bikini on a beach. So I’m glad we’re moving away from this. And we’re starting to recognize that it really is for everybody. You know, like a lot of people, it’s, you know, yoga can be a birthright, that as long as we’re here, we are entitled to these teachings we are entitled to, we are entitled to be given this knowledge and then to do the best we can to utilize it so that it is a benefit to all. So as we practice yoga, in our own lives, we are shifting things within our head visual patterns, we’re shifting things within the way we think the way we perceive. 

And as we begin to do that more and more the way we relate to everyone and everything shifts. So then each and every relationship we end up having will shift and in that way, we’re making these small, they might be really small, incremental shifts, but no less powerful than the really big one. So I always say, I feel like everybody needs to do yoga, we need everybody to do yoga, the world needs everybody doing yoga, of some sort. But again, we get caught up in the world, what does that mean? Do yoga? So it doesn’t mean you have to be on your mat for three hours a day, turning your body into a castle, you know, I mean, maybe if we could just all begin to recognize that we each have this basic goodness within ourselves, and that all other living beings have it as well. And we can begin to relate from that place. Things that look a lot different. There are people who have, you know, health issues, injuries, whatever the case may be. 

Again, if we’re not solely focused on Asana, then we should be able to serve whoever walks into the room. I had a woman actually I spoke to just the other day you called me and she has lupus and she’s in a lupus flare up, and she’s having all kinds of problems, and she’s so stressed, and she’s so anxious, and she’s suffering so greatly. And she just thought ‘maybe yoga would help me,’ and I, I hope she comes to the class I have, I’m encouraging her to come to a certain class, I’m encouraging her to do the work and to recognize that doesn’t matter what you do on the mat. So that’s what’s keeping her away, ‘but I can’t do these fancy things.’ And I, you know, so somebody like that would benefit greatly from the system of yoga. 

And sometimes that, you know, taking Shavasana for an hour, or lying in childs pose for 20 minutes, sometimes that’s, that’s all the yoga we need to have a shift as you create a little bit more space around, whatever might be going on. And see if we might be able to approach things perhaps differently, or just you know, take a little break, you know, maybe we don’t need to do things differently. Maybe there’s no different me right now. But maybe we just need a break. So it really it shows up as what we need, but not always what we thought we want it. So we really, we also have to really be quite open and receptive to, to what is presented at that time. And and begin to work with it as it is.

 

Ariel Zachow

What is your advice to someone who is very interested in finding a class that has more of these more of the ideas of yoga, in addition to the asana practice, say they’ve gone to a yoga class before, and it was very physical is very competitive, competitive physically? How should they go about finding the right teacher for them and somebody that they feel comfortable with? And if they’re dealing with an injury, or an illness? How can they go into a studio trusting that they’re going to be taken care of, because while, in my opinion, it can be kind of easy to get your teachings certification to complete your 200 hour. So it doesn’t always weed out bad teachers- How can someone go to a studio knowing that they’re not going to get hurt, and they’re not going to be forced to, you know, do a headstand if they’re not ready or something like that?

 

“So it’s a very fine balance of finding people that you respect, and that you feel can guide you in the way you need to be led, but also that leave room for you to be you on the path.”

Erica Settino

Yeah. So I guess the the underlying, like, we can’t control what anybody else is going to do. So a lot of it’s a process of elimination, oftentimes, for a lot of people, it’s trying a number of different classes. And, and seeing if you find a good fit, or good match, and you feel comfortable. But also, you know, we’re not going to be able to control the teacher, we’re not going to always like what a teacher says, We’re not going to always like what a teacher does, we’re not going to like with the person next to us is doing all the time, you know, so a lot of the time, you know, practice the same yoga in a public space, it’s an individual practice in a group setting. So that can be very challenging. 

So if it’s powerful to be in that group setting, and there are the collective benefits to being in that group setting. But at the end of the day, as an individual walking into a studio, I think what is most important is that we remember that we are responsible for ourselves and ourselves only. So if somebody is doing something you are uncomfortable with, you don’t have to do it. If somebody is touching you in a way you’re uncomfortable with you don’t you don’t have to accept that. And hopefully, that’s not happening, but it does, you know, it happens. So, I guess it’s, it might sound like a, I don’t have an easy answer, you know, there’s word of mouth, we talk to people, there are reviews, but you know, it’s, it’s so experiential that it can be very challenging. You know, there are people who practice with, you know, one teacher who I, you know, who well maybe I would say, ‘Nope, not for me, that’s not my, not what I want to do for 90 minutes.’ and they love it. 

And somehow or another, it’s feeding what they need at that time. So that’s what can I say, but that’s what they’re doing right then. So it really is a matter of us and our own personal journey, so to speak, I guess to finding the place where we feel comfortable being brave enough and courageous enough to walk into a space and be open to receive what’s being put out there, but also being willing to recognize our own innate intelligence and, and being willing to say, ‘this is not good for me.’ So you know, right off the bat, if you don’t like being hot, don’t go to a hot yoga class. It’s terrible, as far as I’m concerned, but, you know, right off the bat, you can try to read some things that was that, hopefully, you know, there’ll be some description of class, you know, words like ‘restore’ will give somebody who who’s looking for a more passive experience an idea that that might be a good place to begin, gentle beginner, if people want to look for that, you know, most yoga classes, I would say all the classes are mixed level classes, even if they qualify them as beginner or advanced every class, you walk into the mixed level class, because no two people are doing the same thing ever, ever. 

So even two people who can do the exact same shape, or flow rigorously for 90 minutes, seemingly without breaking a sweat, or not doing the exact same thing, we’re just not. And that’s one of the, I think that’s one of the things to be celebrated about our individuality and our uniqueness. But again, every time we take it into a room with a group of people, we lose sight of the fact that that’s actually a good thing. And we feel like we have to conform. And if we’re not, then I must be doing something wrong. Or in the words of my teacher, ‘I must be a yoga loser,’ you know, but there are no yoga losers. There’s no such thing as a yoga loser. So, so a lot of that is being courageous enough to trust your own intelligence, trust your instincts, trust your intelligence, recognize when something is not a benefit to you. And that can be challenging, again, sometimes, you know, a teacher’s role can be to, to get you a little bit out of your comfort zone. But, you know, again, you could go in, I have people in class, and I have people, you know, I’m I teacher, a fairly challenging class, I think my students would laugh at the word ‘fairly’. So there are armed balances options, there are inversion options, I do not do a rigorous- I don’t do 108 chaturangas this, but because everybody’s getting hurt. Why are we doing that?

But, it is my job to try to, in as much as possible, provide something for all of them, people who are in that room. So there are people who are they’re using props, there are people who are- they’re taking much, much different variations. So as, as a teacher, that’s really you know, the forefront in my mind is how am I going to best take care of or care for be aware of the needs of everybody in the room. And that is the responsibility of the teacher. At the end of the day, though, we do have to work with the individuals who are saying, ‘I’m not going to do that I’m not willing to do that.’ I ask everybody who comes to class, new people, I go to studios all the time, I don’t hear anybody asking students, especially new students, if there’s anything new going on with them, I ask every time I teach, and certainly, every time I meet someone new. So we need to, you know, awareness and mindfulness around what it is we’re doing as teachers really needs to, I think the bar needs to be risen a little bit. But also, as individuals looking to walk down this path, and for to take this journey, we also need to recognize that, you know, we’re worthy of taking care of ourselves, just because you walk into a room and there’s a teacher doesn’t mean that they know you better than you know, yourself. And a humble teacher knows that.

 

Ariel Zachow

So you would encourage the students to explore as often as they need to define somebody that they vibe with and connect with and feel safe with?

 

Erica Settino

Yeah, and it’s going to change, it’s going to shift and change, because where are we shifting and changing. And so our teachers, you know, at least here, this idea of really glorifying the teacher has to be put down, you know, that’s not really part of our culture. And it was something that was kind of taken on and, and it got it, it’s become an issue. So glorifying teachers is not as in anyone’s benefit. I love my teachers, I am grateful for my teachers.

And I will continue to learn and grow from them. And but I also, at some point, need to trust who I am, and what I’m doing. And that may be just because this is the way my teacher is going at this point. I don’t necessarily need to go that way. That’s not really actually what’s a benefit for me right now. So it’s a very fine balance of finding people that you can, that you respect, and that you feel can guide you in the way you need to be led, but also that leave room for you to be you on the path. And But yeah, I so I think it’s it is a matter of checking out a lot of different people, you know, and but then there are people who get so attached to their teacher that if there’s a sub, they’re really mad, and want to walk out of the room. Have you ever been that sub i mean, I’ve been that sub, and it’s terrible.

It’s terrible for everybody involved. But you know, there’s there and that’s part of what we’re like working on, is this healthy level of detachment, not pulling anything too close to not pushing anything too far away, and being open and receptive. So it’s an interesting, it’s, I always say, it’s just so interesting. It’s such an interesting process. And it really is a process of observation. And, you know, yoga is a process of getting to know the self. That’s really what we’re after. So it’s not a process of being best friends with this teacher who you like, and you want to be with, it’s a process of getting to know yourself. So yeah, so the first thing, although it’s, you know, it takes time, but, but I do recommend trying out a lot of different places, a lot of different studios, a lot of different teachers and going with your gut, and also, you know, letting go of some of your own judgment and criticism, if those people are those places are not for you, you know, you don’t have to leave the nasty review on Yelp. It could just be that wasn’t for me, and find what is.

 

Ariel Zachow

So if somebody is really interested in these things that you’re talking about, but they’re still a little bit on the fence, what would you say to them in terms of what what they can expect from taking on a regular yoga practice?

 

Erica Settino

I think that we need to leave room for the fact that it can be a bit scary. I think that we need to leave room for the fact that it really is- you know, my teacher, again, Cindy Lee is always talking about just showing up is a really big deal to show up to a yoga studio, people don’t give enough credence, it’s a very big deal for a lot of people to show up to a new place where they don’t know anybody wear tight clothing, be in an uncomfortable situation, make your body do things it’s not used to doing. So I, I think it’s a matter of giving ourselves a little bit more credit, and being more kind and compassionate with ourselves as well. It really does start there, you know, we’re not going to be able to do that for everybody else, not fully, not completely, and not really truly until we’re able to really treat ourselves the way we would treat someone we love. Tenderly and kindly and, and supported through a challenging situation. 

And I think also to have some humor, you know, yoga is can be serious business, but we don’t have to be so serious. While we’re doing it, a little humor, lighten up about it, not becoming so rigid. I always talk about Goldilocks Goldilocks principle and yoga, not too hot, not too cold. Not too soft not too hard, you just trying to find like that, that middle path, that space between, and it’s a practice, and it’s a process, but just showing up is the first step in it. If we don’t show up, we’re never gonna, you know, we’re never going to start to, to take the steps that might be necessary for us to take or that might just be a wild benefit for us to be taking. And maybe people don’t walk away from the class feeling like it’s life changing. It doesn’t have to feel that way. It can be very subtle, it can be very small. But we know that whatever shifts occur, because regardless of what you’re doing, you’re shifting the central nervous system. That’s the benefit.

 

Ariel Zachow

And if somebody is completely and totally at zero, they’ve never they barely have ever even heard of yoga before- where do they start? How do they get started on this journey?

 

Erica Settino

I mean, everywhere you look, there’s a yoga studio today. I mean, there’s almost too many, right? So go in and talk to the owner of the studio, see how you feel about that, see how you connect with just the owner of the studio. Because ultimately, the the vibe you get from the owner of the studio is really what’s going to be passed down, that’s what’s kind of going to be the expectation of the teachers as well, there’s a certain mentality, there’s a certain vibe, there’s a certain structure, there’s almost like an any business, there’s like a certain mission statement, so to speak. 

So go in and see the space, and talk to people. And and just see how you feel, just see how you feel when you walk through the door, there are certain studios, I walk through the door, and I feel like home. And then there are studios that I’ve gone into, and I haven’t had that feeling. And you know, and the class was fine, and the teacher was fine, but it didn’t feel like a space I needed to go back to. And that’s okay, too. So I would say you know, it is a matter of kind of putting yourself out there. And you know, most people have tried yoga today. So somebody you talked to can tell you about something you will fail. But you know, starting from zero, if you can find a class on a schedule that says beginner or gentle I recommend it. 

And I just recommend, like I said to somebody the other day again, I said it’s kind of like learning a new language, you know, in a way, and it is quite literally you’re learning a new language. But also, you have to give yourself time you know it it’s a whole process of unraveling and unfolding. And, and that’s really part of the beauty of it is that again, that there’s no end game. There’s no expectation of having to accomplish anything. I read a quote and I don’t remember who said it, but just recently and said something along the lines of the practice is not an accomplishment. The practice is the gift. It’s a gift. So you know, we’re not out to accomplish anything in the practice, not the poses. Nothing. It’s just the showing up and beginning to get to know yourself a little bit better.

 

Ariel Zachow

Anything else you want to add at the end here? Anything we haven’t covered?

 

Erica Settino

I don’t think so. I mean, I said I think yoga, I think everyone should be doing yoga, right? I mean, I definitely am definitely think that everybody should be doing yoga, I also see the issues surrounding it, and why some people might be hesitant. So I just will reiterate that I think that the world needs you to do some yoga, and that we need you, not you trying to be anybody else. You your own unique, individual self practicing, observing, taking a good look at who you are and how you’re showing up in the world. We need everybody to be doing that. And we need that so that everybody can then bring their own strengths and their own unique traits forward as the gifts to the world because at the end of the day Yoga is a service. It’s a service. It’s a gift that we’ve been given. And then it becomes the service that we’re able to almost like recycle and keep utilizing and give out to others. So we yeah The world needs. The world needs more people doing

 

Ariel Zachow

Perfect, I love it. If people want to connect with you or follow you where should they go?

 

Erica Settino

So you can find the Karuna For Animals on Facebook and on Instagram just Karuna for animals. And you could also email me I’m always happy to get an email Erica@karunafornimals.com and the website is www.karunafornaimals.com.

 

Ariel Zachow

Thank you Erica for taking the time to talk with me today. I hope that this was helpful for you as my listeners. Please don’t hesitate to reach out to Erica if you’d like to learn more about her nonprofit. As always, you can reach out to me. You can find me on instagram @compassion.as.my compass or shoot me an email to Ariel@compassionasmycompass. com. Thank you again for taking the time to listen I so appreciate every moment that you give me and that you give the show. If you have any requests for upcoming shows or you’d like to be a guest yourself, please reach out to me. Otherwise I will see you next week for our next episode.

 

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Yoga

Protect Your Joints

by ArielZachow

I like to consider myself a relatively mellow person. Not a whole lot gets me riled up. But you know what does? People hurting their joints. I swear, even thinking about it makes me a little fiery.

 

“But, why, Ariel? Why are you such a raging lunatic about this?” you ask. Well, wonderful readers, I’ll let you in on a little secret. It seems as though our society is having problems with near sightedness. The trend in fitness and wellness is to do everything big and fast. Why lose weight slowly when you could drop 50lbs in 2 weeks and be summer ready almost instantly? Why lift 3lbs when you could lift 350lbs?! Why do a relaxing yin practice when you’re tired when you could do a 90 minute power flow class to burn off the half of a cookie you had yesterday?

 

I totally and completely understand the appeal of fast results and the idea of “go big or go home”. I get it. We live in a time where things happen almost instantly. Very little in life takes time anymore. So the idea of going at a slow and steady pace to lose those extra pounds, or dedicating time to lay a solid foundation in terms of form and technique is almost a foreign thought. I get that. However! There are some things that can be incredibly unsafe to do at our normal, fast pace.

 

For so long in my business as a personal trainer, I couldn’t figure out why my average client was over 60 years old and my 20-something clients never stuck around. Until one day it clicked. Almost across the board, my younger clients didn’t like the slow pace I set. They didn’t want to take the time to perfect their form because their friend at Crossfit was already squatting 5 million pounds and they wanted to be there too. They wanted that magic number to brag about to their social media friends. But my clients in their 60’s had a totally different thought process. They were at a point in their life where their body started to respond to the years of (probably unintentional) abuse. They cared so much less about what their stats were on paper and put all of their emphasis on how they felt.

 

 

This post today is dedicated to the importance of setting that solid foundation for joint health. Yes, it will be slower going than Chad and his Crossfit experience, but I promise that when you hit age 60, your joints will be happy and healthy and Chad will be on his 20th knee replacement. (Okay, that was maybe a little dramatic, but you get what I’m going for). We’ll branch out a bit from a strict focus on a yoga based practice and talk about how you can apply this to your asana practice, your other forms of fitness, and every part of your life.

 

Personally, the more scientific side of anatomy bores the crap out of me (ironic, I know, considering my job is to work with the body). Today, let’s focus less on science, more on the practical side of things and how it applies to your daily life. And I promise, this is very simple. I’m going to break it down for you in one, single sentence. Ready?


If you feel pain in your joints, stop what you are doing.

 

 

 There. That’s basically it. Simple, right?! When working the body, there is a very different feeling between muscle pain and joint pain. Muscle pain in a workout, typically, is very normal. For joints, I personally take a very conservative approach. VERY conservative. For me and my clients, there is no pushing through joint pain.

 

 

So, you feel pain in your joint, you stop what you’re doing, but now what? I’ll offer a few tips that you can try in certain moves, and if the pain does not stop I encourage you to find someone that can help you in person (maybe a personal trainer, physical therapist- a professional that can check your form).

 

Never lock your joints–

This is a big one and a mistake I see in every single person that has ever entered my studio. It can feel very secure to lock out your knees or your elbows, but it may be causing way more harm than you realize. Locking your joints puts an incredible amount of stress on them, and sets you up for massive injury. When you come up from a push up, when you’re standing during a dead lift, stretching in pyramid pose, or even just standing waiting for the bus, check in with your joints. Are they locked? Are they hyper extended? If so, soften them. I tell my clients “straight but soft”. You want to think 98% of totally straight. This is a difficult adjustment to make, and you probably don’t even realize you’re doing it, but try to get in the habit of checking in with your joints in every part of your day and see if a little softness helps.

 

Knees over toes-

Another mistake I see all too often is the relation of knees and toes. When someone sits down into a squat and their weight shifts to the toes, the knees fall forward over the toes and take on all of the stress of that move. When you’re in a move like a squat, a lunge, warrior 1 or 2, take a look down at your knee. Ideally, it’s exactly over your ankle. In any move with a similar set up, you should have your weight in your heel. You should be able to pick up your toes and wiggle them around so you know that your weight is in your heel.

 

 

Knees falling to the side-

Similar to having your knee over your ankle (and not over your toes) in terms of front and back, make sure that you’re in line with your ankle left to right. If your knees are falling off to the side, this is just another way to stress the joint. Take a look-in your warrior 2, is your shin straight up and down or at more of an angle?

 

Landing Softly-

This is another tough one to make happen, but it is just as important. When you’re in the middle of your workout and you’re working your way through some burpees or jump squats, pay attention to how you’re landing. You should never land on a straight leg. Soften your landing in every move that has you leaving the ground. Add a mini (or full) squat to allow the momentum of your move to run out through your muscles, not your joints. And, of course, if you’re turning your landing into a squat, keep an eye on those knees.

 

 

I understand this is a difficult concept to explain via a text post, but I’m hoping it will give you a few ideas on how to try to self correct. Please, please, if you are STILL feeling joint pain, or you are unsure, seek additional help. Don’t know a trainer or physical therapist? Send me a message! I’m happy to chat about this with you. I am so incredibly passionate about keeping people healthy and happy not just today, but well into the later part of life. You CAN still work out and get healthy and do awesome physical shit while keeping your form solid and your joints protected. It just takes a bit of thought.

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Overcoming Competition in a Yoga Class with Leah Dubbin-Steckel
InterviewsYoga

Overcoming Competition in a Yoga Class with Leah Dubbin-Steckel

by ArielZachow

An interview with Leah Dubbin-Steckel

Do you find it difficult to focus on yourself during a yoga class? Are you constantly distracted by those around you? Have your classes turned from self care to a focus on competing with those in the room around you? This week I speak with Leah Dubbin-Steckel about the competition that can happen in a yoga class, how to make the competition work for you, and how to overcome it when it is no longer helpful.

Ariel: I am joined today by a good friend of mine, Leah Dubbin-Steckel. Leah is a Calgary native, she lives currently in Brooklyn, New York. She is an actor and a body positive activist. Leah is going to talk to us today about overcoming the competitive side of a yoga practice. So, Leah, welcome. Thank you so much for joining me today. I am very excited to have you here.

Leah: Hi! I’m so happy to be here. This is exciting.

A: So, for those of you that don’t know Leah was the first friend that I made when I moved to New York several years ago. We went to college together. And Leah is actually the reason that I got into yoga. I don’t know if you remember, Leah, but when we were living in the dorms you forced me to go to hot yoga and I did not want to.

Leah: (laughing) I do remember!

A: And it was horrible!

L: It was so bad! It was carpeted. Why was it carpeted?!

A: It was a hot yoga studio with carpet, but it was very inexpensive and it was literally one block from our dorms, so we went. It was a very interesting start for me in terms of my history with yoga. But I feel like my journey really started with you, which is exciting, because you’re a big part of my life. One thing that you and I know about, having sort of lived a little bit in this acting career is that competition is a really big thing. So I want to talk to you today about your experience with competition in a yoga class and how it compares to other things. But I want to start at the beginning, so tell me a little bit about you and a little bit about where your yoga practice started.

L: Okay, so, a little about me. I grew up- I didn’t do yoga ever in my childhood. It’s not something that my parents were active in or anything. I did a lot of sports. One at a time for maybe one or two years before deciding that they were too hard or I couldn’t get something done so I would quit them. It was soccer, then I tried to be a goalie and we lost our game worse than we had ever lost ever-it was embarrassing. And figure skating and I couldn’t do a jump so I quit and gymnastics and a lot of different things. And dance intermittently. Dance I always came back to, but would leave because I felt bad about my body and the more I quit the further behind I was, thus not great for my competitive nature. So the more I couldn’t be the best person in a class, the more I would just bail out of it. I essentially found yoga the year after I graduated high school and I think it wasn’t a coincidence that it was sort of at a similar time that I finally found a dance studio that was really inclusive and I didn’t feel like I needed to impress anyone and so at the same time I jumped right into hot yoga. Because for some reason it was like if I’m gonna do yoga, I’m gonna do the hardest version of yoga I can do. And so that was hot yoga. So I did that for a year before I moved [to New York]. And it was great, but it was-as a person who struggled with my body for a long time, it was rough because the majority of people who did hot yoga were very traditionally athletic looking people.

A: And I think it’s important to say that while I’m a certified yoga teacher, and Leah has what I would consider a pretty long history with yoga, we’re not-I don’t even really know how to world it- we’re not super professional yogis. We’re just normal people and it’s interesting because you and I talk about this often-there is- and I don’t know if this stems from our history with theatre, which is a very visual art. So, I remember a couple of calls that you and I have gone to together where you go into a room, and it’s called type casting, and this company is looking to fill a certain role. They line everyone up, and walk down the row and say “yes” or “no” and if you get a “no” it’s because you didn’t look right and so we very much have a basis of what you look like is very important

L: It’s how you market yourself.

“So the more I couldn’t be the best person in a class, the more I would just bail out of it.”

A: Absolutely. So to go to these yoga classes and you and I have been to several studios and we’ve done things separately and together and we used to- I used to make Leah lead a yoga class in our apartment because I didn’t want to go to a studio because there is a lot of discomfort with somebody being uncomfortable in their body or they don’t look a certain way or don’t look the way they think they should look. When you’re put next to someone who has what you would consider a more ideal body type, it’s difficult. It’s difficult to be next to that person, and you can’t focus on your practice, you’re focusing more on, ‘does she look better, or do I look better than her in this situation’. So I’d love for you to talk about the differences or similarities that you notice in the competition of acting or dancing and the, I guess, made-up competition of a yoga class.

L: Oh, yeah. I honestly didn’t really put those two and two together until this moment but when you’re in a yoga studio and there’s a mirror and you’re packed into a room full of people and you can essentially see everyone because of the mirror-

A: And in New York City where we do yoga primarily there’s a lot of people in a little tiny studio-

L: Oh, yeah. It’s insane. But it does sort of have a similar vibe to a dance class and therefore coming from that background makes it a little performative. And especially because it’s not a traditional fitness class it’s much more fluid and has a much more dance like element to it that I feel like exacerbates all of it and makes you feel like you are being put on display and that people are watching you even though they’re not, even if it’s entirely in your head but it had its positives and negatives. It definitely helped push me in my practice when I first started out and I didn’t know what I was doing I would pick the best person in the class and I would emulate them and I would try and get to as close to their form as possible and then as I got better and started getting comfortable being in the front of the class, then I would pick people in the same line as me and that’s, I think, where this trigger of, ‘I’m going to do better than you’ kicked in, especially if that person was smaller than me.

A: That’s interesting that you say that because, and you know this about me, in college we studied musical theater, and a big part of that, of course, is dance and I don’t have a history of dance in my background, so I was very uncomfortable. I would do the same thing where I would think of somebody in our class that I thought was really, really great, and I would think to myself, ‘okay, I want to be like this person today because they do it so well and they do it so confidently, and there’s no way that I could ever have that confidence.” Regardless of what the reasons you’re doing it for, I think it’s kind of a natural thing to pick somebody who you think is better than you and try to be like them. Whether it’s, ‘I want to be as good as you,’ or ‘I want to be better than you because you’re better than me,’- So let’s turn this into more of a competition.

Do you find that with your practices now, do you still have those same feelings and those same tendencies? Or now that you’re sort of dabbling more into this world of body positivity have your feelings changed?

L: Yes, definitely. It is still a struggle every time I’m on my mat and I’m in class, but much like I know a lot of people when they go to a yoga class struggle with the concept of clearing their mind and thinking of only their breath- For me, when my eyes are closed, I actually have a pretty decently easy time just thinking about my breath, maybe because I’m a vocalist and just focusing on something like that has been something I’ve worked on for years, but it is a constant battle and now every time I start to compete with the person next to me it is immediate, ‘No, back to your own mat. Look at what you’re doing. Look yourself in the eyes and push yourself to your own limit.’

A: Is that a new feeling or was there a specific turning point that got you to that point or is that something that you think has morphed over time as your practice has continued?

L: I think honestly, and I’m going to plug you plug you a little bit here, when I started doing more exercise outside of yoga and I started feeling better about my overall fitness level  and my overall health, it instilled a sense of confidence that even though I am not, and most likely never be- I say most likely like I’m about to grow an extra foot on my extra tiny T-Rex arms- even though I will never look like a classic, stereotypical yoga body, I am confident and happy with my strength and with what my body can do. So, yeah, it took a little of knowing my body can do other things than yoga to make me confident in my own practice.

A: Do you find that these natural competitive tendencies are helpful for you in anyway?

 “Look at what you’re doing. Look yourself in the eyes and push yourself to your own limit.”

L: Yeah, it’s definitely a detriment, I think, to my mental yoga practice. The basis of what yoga is is spiritual, and so I I think the competition is not a part of that but physically if it makes me hold my plank a little bit longer, or  makes me push through one more thing, one more moment of Warrior 2 when I thought my legs were going to get it give out, then there is a benefit to that, but I would like to get to the point where I am pushing through it not because the person next to me is pushing through it, but because of myself. So it has its benefits but it is 100% unnecessary if you’re just focusing on yourself.

A: So how do you in your practices and in your workouts and really in your daily life even if you’re going to an open call- How do you find the balance of allowing this little bit of competition to be very beneficial to you but also not going so far into being hyper focus on somebody else and sort of letting yourself fall away- how do you find the balance?

L: It always comes back to you sort of have to internally shirk a little bit of your humility. And you have to go back to, ‘I am worthy, I am good, I know what I’m doing, I have skills.’ It’s less putting yourself above another person specifically, but just knowing that you are enough and that’s really meditative. It’s just using that as a mantra, ‘I don’t need to worry about those people because everyone is dealing with their own stuff, and so I don’t see it and I don’t need to know what it is.’

A: So would you just call that a basis of confidence in your own abilities?

L: Yeah. Absolutely

A: How did you find that, because when I look back on our friendship I would always consider you a very confident person. But I think a lot of people that put that off are just a little bit quieter about their insecurities. So would you consider yourself forever a confident person, or is this a newly found ability? To look at yourself and say, ‘you know what, I am enough, and let me see how I can be a better me and not just a better yogi than the person next to me.’

L: It’s totally new. It was a facade for a very long time. For a long time with my size I just wouldn’t talk about it. If you don’t mention exercise, if you don’t mention your weight, then it doesn’t exist. And so that would allow me to feel my self-consciousness privately because I would never talk about it publicly. Then eventually I got to a point where I would use it be openly self-conscious and use it as a punchline. So I went from one extreme to the other where now all of the sudden it’s like I would point out my food baby and joke about my fat and just really let everyone know that I know. What changed is the more people I had in my life who were confident, or at least acted like they were confident, even if they weren’t in private, made me feel more confident. Plus I had a real turning point in college- we had just gone through one of our dance demonstrations and I had a girl come up to me and say after our ballet performance, she said, ‘I’m really inspired by you. Everyone I see, everyone who is doing well in dance is so small and it’s really inspiring to see a girl who isn’t succeeding, and being able to do everything that they can do.’ And at first It was like, ‘she knows that I’m not tiny!’ And then I was like, ‘no, wait, it doesn’t matter!’ So, yeah, I think the more everyone normalizes being the size that you are, as long as you are healthy, the better you feel and that’s why the media is so important, and that’s why surrounding yourself with positive people of different sizes and backgrounds, and not to make it sound selfish, but there you go.

A: To me, the idea of being selfish is, I think, misrepresented a bit. I think that you and I have become much more selfish people as we’ve grown but not in a negative two other people sort of way, but a, ‘you know, here’s where I feel good or I feel comfortable and here’s where I feel confident,’ And our friendship has had sort of a with that some growing pains along the way and there were a few times where we lost touch a little bit as we tried to find ourselves. But I look at us now compared to what we were then and I’m proud of us. We are able to say, ‘this is the size that I am now, and maybe I’m not super stoked, maybe I want to push harder to look XYZ but at the same time I can feel good about me and I don’t really care what anybody else thinks about my size.’ And of course you’re allowed to say you no. ‘No, I don’t want to go and do this because I am busy working on me,’ or ‘I don’t want to go out and go drinking because I’m trying to feel better about myself.’ There’s a selfish aspect to that but I think when the word selfish is used there’s a negative connotation and it doesn’t necessarily need to be.

L: It doesn’t necessarily mean that you are disscompassionate or you don’t care about other people you just at some point have to put your own mental health first because no one else is going to.

If you’d prefer to listen to this interview, please do so HERE. 

A: So that girl who came up to you after your ballet performance, is that what planted the seed of this body positive activism? Because over the past couple of weeks and months you’ve really jumped in and it’s been sort of amazing to watch.

L: It’s a seed that sprouts slowly, that Sprouts self-love. It’s not like she told me that and I went, ‘a-ha! Now I’m going to love myself!’ you know? It’s a process and so it’s just a moment that sticks out to me. But there have definitely been several over the years and they all just build you up.

A: Looking at where you are now, would you consider yourself someone who can embrace every part of who you are or do you still deal with self-doubt and the occasional unhealthy competitive aspect?

L: Oh, yeah. I think I’m winning the battle but it is always a battle We’ve been trained, especially as women, to analyze everything about ourselves and to be quietly competitive with other women. Men can be openly- as I get on my pedestal to preach this- men can be openly actively competitive and for women it’s a little quieter. So it’s about quieting the thoughts. But sometimes they win and sometimes they lose. You can’t beat yourself up over it either. As long as you’re not actively sabotaging another person to get ahead, that’s a good start.

A: So what would your advice be to somebody who- maybe they go to yoga class now and they don’t feel super confident in their body, maybe they’re afraid to go to classes, maybe it’s too much competition for them- what are your recommended first steps to get out of this idea of the competition of being the best in the room or being better than somebody else?

L: First of all, find a studio or a practice that doesn’t have that competitive energy. That helps. Find somewhere that you really feel comfortable, that you feel is a community. I think your yoga studio should feel like a community. Which luckily mine does. Really it’s very simple. Just focus on your breath. If you’re focusing on that and you’re focusing on doing everything to the best of your ability and not pushing too hard and just being kind to your body, then there’s no space left to think about other people.

A: I like that. I think that’s very Simple and while there are difficult parts to it, it’s a pretty clear starting point and it’s something that you don’t have to reserve for a yoga studio or your yoga practice. It can be, if I’m sitting on the train and I see somebody across from me and I start to compare myself to her, I can say, ‘you know what, now would be a good time to do a mini meditation’ and to focus on my breath and feeling solid.

L: And be kind to yourself to when that doesn’t happen because we’re human and everyone slips sometimes. So if you find yourself comparing yourself to another person don’t get down or anything just stop it in that moment.

A: So to sum it up just stop it.

L: (laughing) Just stop it. That’s the whole thing That is the final, brilliant piece of information I have four people is just stop it.

A: I like that. Is there any last little bit you’d like to add?

L: Tidbits of information- wear what you want. Wear what makes you feel comfortable. No one can tell you what is or is not a yoga body. These are feel like cliches, but they’re true. Yoga is good for you, so don’t let anyone tell you you can’t do it go do yoga.

A: Thank you so much for joining me. I think this was really helpful and we did stray a bit from the competition aspect, but to say it’s just competition is incorrect, because there’s a lot of reasons behind why it becomes competitive. And I think we touched on a lot of those reasons and I appreciate you sharing your story. I think it will be really helpful for a lot of people. If you are interested in contacting Leah, you can go to her website or find her on Instagram @dubsetck.

 

 

 

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